For those of you that personally know the J-man Trumpets himself, you’ll know that I currently work at a place called McDonalds. That’s right, the golden arches themselves have decided to employ one of the finest people in a 1-mile radius of where I live, and it’s been an educating experience for me.
First of all, you immediately learn that 98% of customers are irrational douchebags. The concept of “fast food” has blinded them to the truth so much that they expect the impossible when it comes to ordering and receiving food. Let me give you an example just so you know exactly where I’m coming from.
Let’s say, for the purposes of this hypothetical, that McDonalds sells very cheap food (Try and keep up; I know I’m blowing your mind with this hypothetical). A customer walks into the McDonalds and says to himself, “What can I have for lunch today that is light and not too filling.” The answer to his question, of course, is 49 cheeseburgers off of the dollar menu.
The man places his order at the front counter to the greatest employee McDonalds ever did see, and he stands near the counter awaiting for that same employee to place a grotesquely huge bag of cheeseburgers in front of his fat face. Ten seconds pass by, and the man begins to panic! “Where the hell is my food? What if they forgot about me? What about what I want?” The man beckons the employee over, and asks very politely: “WHERE THE FUCK ARE MY 49 CHEESEBURGERS”